The problem is - whenever I engage in coitus with my husband, I simulate an orgasm. The truth is, I have never experienced a real orgasm in my life.

 

I have a problem of a sexual nature which I am most reluctant to discuss with our family doctor. The problem is - whenever I engage in coitus with my husband, I simulate an orgasm. The truth is I have never experienced an orgasm in my life.

During our first year of marriage my husband became terribly upset when he saw that he was not capable of bringing me to climax. Because it was beginning to adversely affect our marriage, one night I pretended that I had reached orgasm. My husband was beside himself with joy. His reaction was so positive that I decided to do the same thing when next we made love.

His attitude towards me changed. He was more considerate and loving and was very much easier to live with. With his confidence as a lover restored, his sexual appetite increased which meant that I too, had to carry out my deception more frequently.

Try as I might, I have never been able to truly reach a climax. Perhaps it is due to the fact that I had a very strict religious upbringing during which time sex was usually associated with sin. I cannot even completely enjoying love-making since I got married, and I find myself in a position where each time after the completion of the act, I feel dirty and guilty because I am lying to my husband.

Yet I know that if I do not lie, our marriage would have ended by now. I do love my husband and I feel we are doing a fine job raising our children. I cannot give you more personal details because I feel it would be tragic if my husband found out that I wrote this letter.

Do you feel that I am justified in deceiving my husband as I am and have been doing - or is my behavior as immoral as I think it is?

Mrs. ML

From the FORUM Archives